Trish Stratus: Secret Santa
by BizGirlCharlie
Summary: Part 3 up! When Trish's Secret Santa goes above and beyond she starts to wonder if what she has is really what she wants
1. Chapter 1

Title – Trish Stratus: Secret Santa (Story 1 of 'The Right Guy' series)

Rating – PG-13

Summary – When Trish's secret santa goes above and beyond, she starts to wonder if what she has is really what she wants. 

Characters - The Raw roster, plus Jessie from Tough Enough 2 (as a production assistant/general stagehand type deal)

Disclaimer – I don't own the superstars mentioned in this story. Their bodies are owned by themselves and their souls are owned by Vince McMahon. 

Note - I use a mixture of real and fake names in this story. If names are obviously fake - ie The Hurricane or Test, I use their real names, otherwise I use their stage names - eg Molly, Victoria, etc. I think it makes it easier to identify people that way. Also, it's part kayfabe and part not, in that I'm writing about the characters and not the real people, but the shows/storylines and the characters' real lives are still separate, ie the matches are "real" but the storylines (eg Jericho and Trish) are "scripted". This allows me to make it so that the divas mostly get along and it's how I'll be writing the rest of this series. Clear as mud? Cool. 

"Oh, the Secret Santa policy. Started last year because Eric Bischoff was desperate to pretend he actually had friends," Trish muttered under her breath as she watched that damn butt-licker Jonathan Coachman select a paper from the bucket. "Please God don't let him choose me."

Lita smirked at her. "Since when did you become so cynical? It's Christmas, Trish."

Trish shook her head. "It's not Christmas, it's November and this is a bad idea. If we wanted to get each other gifts we'd just do it. Then at least we'd be giving stuff to people we actually know. You're lucky you missed out last year, Li. It's tragic. The sleazy smirk on Hunter's face as Stacy opened up this disgusting little set of novelty breasts marked with the words 'get some today'." Trish shuddered at the memory of Stacy's face, not to mention Drew's.

"Novelty breasts, doesn't seem like Hunter's style," Lita commented. "If he really cared you'd think he'd have given her a gift voucher so she could have had the implants done for real."

"Twenty dollar limit," Trish sighed. "Not only is Bischoff a sad, lonely man, he's also cheap."

"So what happened with Stacy? Andrew wasn't happy, I'll bet."

"No way," Trish confirmed. "If you thought things got ugly when Hunter stole Stephanie from him, you should have seen it this time. Uncomfortable isn't the word."

Lita cocked her head, her hazel eyes filled with amusement. "See, unlike you, I think I might have liked to see that."

"Trust me, be glad you weren't there. My secret santa was RVD. I got a pair of socks. And not just socks, Christmas socks. I guess he was high when he went shopping."

Lita laughed. "You're mean. Christmas socks - I think that's sweet. And besides, what do you buy the woman who has everything?"

Trish just rolled her eyes as the bucket reached her. "Just please don't let me get Hunter or Drew." She picked out a slip of paper and passed the bucket on to Lita. 

For the first time during the entire production meeting she actually smiled as she read the name on her paper. Bubba Ray Dudley. Same name as last year. Actually, maybe this secret santa thing wasn't such a bad idea. If it hadn't been for last year's ballot, Trish and Bubba might never have gotten together in the first place. Having drawn Bubba's name, Trish pondered for weeks about what to get for him. Nothing had seemed quite right and definitely nothing under the twenty dollar limit. Eventually she'd realized something - she had a crush on Bubba Ray and the reason no gift seemed good enough was because the thing she really wanted to give him was herself. In the end she'd taken a huge chance and when it came time to exchange gifts, Bubba was the only one not to receive a thing. His present came that night when Trish showed up at his hotel room door wearing just a robe and some expensive (well over twenty dollars) lingerie. The rest was history. Eleven months down the track and they were still together, despite the fact that the heady days of new love had disappeared along with last winter's snows. Now they were well and truly coupled. They were a pair, a partnership. It was reliable and comfortable and with good sex on tap whenever she wanted it, who could complain?

"So, who'd you get?" Lita pried, glancing over Trish's shoulder before she could cover the name. "Oh, too easy!" the redhead protested, showing Trish her paper. Stacy Keibler. "What am I going to get her?"

Trish just shrugged. "Anything but breasts."

* * * *

Four days later and the Raw crew was back on the road. After having worked off the cobwebs in the ring with Lita, Trish made her way backstage.

"Hey beautiful," called a deep voice with a New York accent.

Trish broke into a grin at the sight of her boyfriend leaning up against the wall next to the divas' locker room. "Hey. Been waiting long?"

"Naw." Bubba leaned down to brush his lips over hers. "Just missed you, is that so wrong?"

Trish giggled. A year together and he could still be completely sweet. She played the cool modern woman and arched her eyebrows at him. "Didn't I see you like a couple of hours ago?"

Bubba shrugged. "Any guy with a woman as hot as you's gotta keep an eye on her."

Trish's sculpted eyebrow arched even further. "You know that's sexist."

"Yeah? Well you're sex-y," Bubba replied simply, drawing her into his arms again. "But you know what? I just remembered 'bout this secret santa deal. If we get a chance tomorrow you wanna hit the mall and pick something out?"

Trish blinked and thought quickly. "Actually, I already promised Lita me and her would go." She paused, noticing the disappointed look on Bubba's face. "You can come too, if you want."

"Go shopping with the girls?" Bubba cried. "I don't think so."

"Oh, and why not?" Trish asked, offended.

"Simple, Trish. I go shopping alone, I'm done in thirty minutes. When you and me go, it takes around two hours, but put you with another girl and it's gonna take all day, not to mention tire us all out so by the time we get to the house show tomorrow night we're dead on our feet. It's not gonna happen like that, Trish."

"Okay, grump," Trish nodded. "Just me and Lita then. But so you know, a lot of things in life aren't all about how quick you can do them."

"Don't I know," Bubba smirked.

"And I'm not sure I'm going to like my Christmas presents this year if it only took you half an hour to pick them out," Trish added.

"Oh, don't worry 'bout that," Bubba promised. "When you know what you want, it don't take long."

Trish grinned. "Bubba, it took you two years, and even then I had to do the work for you."

"Hey, I had to open the door," Bubba protested.

"Yeah," Trish nodded. "And I'm glad you did." She gave him a quick peck on the lips. "I'll see you after. I'd better go get changed. Trish Stratus does not wear gym pants to the ring."

She squeezed his hands, then released them to walk into the women's locker room. "Hey Li, we're going secret santa shopping tomorrow," she announced, heading over to her things.

"Cool," Lita replied simply, not even looking up from fixing her makeup. 

"Oh, Trish!" Molly cried. "I was waiting for you to get here. Someone left a gift addressed to you."

"Really?" Trish frowned, taking the small package and card from Molly. She skimmed the card, looking for the sender's name. "It's from my secret santa. Did you see who left it?"

"No," the small brunette replied. "There was no one here when I arrived. Just the gift."

"Hmm," Trish murmured, undoing the gold wrapping to find a small jewelry box. She lifted the lid and there was a pair of earrings, long and thin with tiny crystals like droplets of rain hanging from them. 

"They're beautiful," Lita called from over her shoulder. "I hope my secret santa gives me something half as good."

Stacy snorted. "I'll be happy with anything but what I got last year. I hate this secret santa thing."

"Hey, isn't the gift exchange date December 15th?" Victoria piped up.

"It says something about that in the note," Trish told them, before reading it out. "'Trish, I know this is early, but I saw it at a market and thought you might like it and I didn't want to lose it over the next few weeks. Merry Christmas, Trish. Your Secret Santa.'"

"So any idea who it is?" Lita asked her.

"No," Trish shook her head. "Could be anyone, but whoever it is has great taste. They're gorgeous!"

"Must be a woman," Terri called. "No man I know has an eye for beauty like that."

"No, it's a guy," Gail Kim argued. "It came early. It's gotta be a guy."

Trish left them all to speculate as she tried on the earrings. She hoped that her secret santa would ultimately reveal himself (or herself) at the official gift change, but whatever happened, these gorgeous earrings sure beat a pair of Christmas socks!

* * * *

"Hey Lita," Trish said listlessly as she opened her hotel room door the next day to find her friend waiting to go shopping. "I'm going!" she called over her shoulder before stepping into the hallway.

"Something wrong?" Lita asked her as they started for the elevators.

Trish gave an angry shake of her head. "It's this secret santa thing. I should never have showed Bubba the earrings. Apparently there's some kind of unwritten guy rule that says you can't buy jewelry for someone else's girlfriend."

A smile crept onto Lita's lips. "He's jealous?"

"Very," Trish confirmed. "He doesn't even want me to wear the earrings, so I can't because it upsets him, which really sucks because they're gorgeous."

"So wear them when he's not looking," Lita suggested.

"I am," Trish announced, pulling the box from her purse and using the elevator's mirrored walls to help her put them in. 

"How does he even know they're from a guy?" Lita asked.

"He doesn't," Trish replied. "He's assuming."

"Ass-uming," Lita repeated, drawing out the first syllable. "Well, let him. It's good he's jealous. Means he'll get you something even better for Christmas just to out-do the secret santa. Men are predictable like that."

"Yeah, maybe. I just wish I knew who it was. If it turned out to be a woman, he'd get off my case and I could wear the earrings whenever I wanted. Maybe he'd even tell me to my face they look good on me instead of flying off the handle about how they must have cost over the twenty-dollar limit."

"Well, let's figure it out," Lita suggested. "First of all, the note said the earrings came from a market. How many men do you know who'd actually shop at a market, unless their wife or girlfriend dragged them along?"

"Rico?" Trish shrugged.

"Rico's gay, so if it is him, you don't have a problem," Lita pointed out.

"Not true," Trish argued. "Straight men feel threatened by gay men, so we have a new problem instead. But I think it has to be a guy. He said he hoped I'd like the earrings, not that they'd look great on me. See what I mean?"

"Yeah," Lita mused. "If only there was some way to figure out who it was before December 15th. . .then you could find out it was Eric Bischoff and you wouldn't want to wear the earrings anyway."

"Funny," Trish muttered. "But you're right. I need to find out who this secret santa is."

* * * *

"Any ideas, girls?" Trish asked, after having shared her predicament with more or less all the Raw divas. 

"Why does it matter?" Ivory asked her. "You let a man control you for one minute, you got problems, girl. Men are good for sex and sex alone and they're not even so great at that!"

Trish sighed, turning away from Ivory. "Any other ideas?"

"You could ask Bischoff," Molly announced. "I heard him telling Coach that the draw this year worked even better than last year, so that must mean he knows who drew who."

"Great," Stacy muttered. "I got the breasts last year. Who bets this year I get a penis or something?"

"We're not talking about your private life, Stacy," Gail stated acidly.

"Like you can talk," Stacy retorted. "Who is it this week, Gail? King and JR?"

"No, actually it's Conway and Dupree," Gail replied simply. "Dupree's a better screw, but Conway gives good head, so it works."

Lita raised her eyebrows. "If you're so into that kind of thing, maybe you should move over to SmackDown. I mean, they do have the World's Greatest Tag Team over there."

"And so have I," Gail announced, continuing when she was greeted with blank looks. "Had them, I mean. Trish, if you want to find out something, why don't you just ask me? Men can not keep their mouths shut when they want sex and anything you want to know is yours."

"You really think one of your toys is gonna know who my secret santa is?" Trish asked skeptically.

"Trish, one of Gail's toys could be your secret santa," Lita pointed out.

"Okay," Trish nodded. "Gail, if you think you can find out, go for it."

"I don't think I can, I know I can," Gail replied. "Come in!" she shouted as someone knocked at the door.

In walked Jessie, her head bowed. "Hi, Trish, someone gave me this package to give to you."

"Thanks," Trish smiled.

"Bye guys," Jessie said quickly, darting from the room.

Trish look down at the slightly larger package in her hands. "Weird."

"Maybe Bubba's trying to make up," Lita shrugged.

"Stranger things have happened," Trish agreed, opening the card and beginning to read. "Let me take that back. Stranger things haven't happened."

"What's it say?" Lita prompted.

"'Trish. When I look at you I lose track of time. I thought maybe you could keep it for me. Merry Christmas. Your Secret Santa.'"

"Hmm, I think your secret santa has just become your secret admirer," Molly announced.

Gail rolled her eyes. "What, is this high school? Let me guess, he gave you a watch."

Trish undid the packaging and sure enough, there was a watch - a funky silver Fossil watch.

"Uh, Trish, that costs a lot more than twenty dollars," Terri announced.

"Try seventy," Lita added.

Gail rolled her eyes again. "I'm gonna nip this in the bud right now. Trish, you want to know who your secret santa is? I'm going to find out for you."

And with that, she left the room.

"Or you could just ask Jessie who handed her the package," Molly suggested.

"Yeah, I think I like that way better," Trish nodded. "Not quite as nasty. Wish me luck."

* * * *

Trish finally tracked Jessie down to a corner just inside the entry door. The girl was trying to look inconspicuous as she shouted into a cell phone. Trish waved in front of her face and she hastily ended the call.

"Look, I'm hanging up on you. Bye." She frowned warily up at Trish. "Do they need me again? It's my break time."

"No," Trish assured her. "I just wanted to ask you something. Who gave you that package to give to me?"

Jessie paused. "I really don't know," she admitted. "It's been crazy tonight. Nick had the day off and they forgot to replace him and it feels like we're all doing double or triple duty. I was trying to pass around final schedules when suddenly I have this package in my hand and it's addressed to you. I'm sorry,but I have absolutely no idea how it got there."

Trish gave a frustrated sigh. "You don't remember anything? Who was around at the time?"

"Just the usual guys," Jessie shrugged. "No wrestlers."

Trish nodded. "And you production people don't do the secret santa thing?"

"No, we do our own," Jessie told her. "Was that what it was? A secret santa present?"

"Yeah, only it was a little too expensive to be a secret santa thing," Trish explained. "Listen, if you remember anything, can you let me know?"

"Sure," Jessie nodded. "I guess I'll get back to fighting with my boyfriend now."

"Well, you don't have to call him," Trish pointed out.

Jessie broke into a smile. "You're right. I don't." And with that, she put her cell phone away.

* * * *


	2. Chapter 2

Sunday night brought yet another house show, and an irate Bubba Ray. Somehow or other he'd heard about the watch and was absolutely furious with the nerve of Trish's secret santa, to use the policy as a forum to hit on her. While Trish partly didn't mind Bubba's outrage (a little bit of jealousy was great for the ego), she also didn't want him doing anything stupid - like challenging the entire locker room to a gauntlet match just so he could get his hands on 'Santa'.

"Any news, Gail?" Trish asked as soon as she entered the locker room.

"Give me some time," Gail replied coolly. "Rene and Rob didn't know, but that doesn't mean Mark and Garrison won't."

"Jindrak and Cade," Victoria commented. "Her newest tag team."

"Why do you waste your time with those rookies?" Stacy questioned, aghast.

"Why do you waste your time with Test?" Gail shrugged.

Trish ignored the catfight that had begun to unfold. "I'm going to go do what I've been avoiding since this started," she announced. "I'm going to go see Bischoff."

* * * *

"Trish Stratus!" His sleazy smirk said everything. At least one of them was happy she'd come by his office. "What can I do for you?"

Trish stood with hands on hips. "I want to know who my secret santa is."

All of a sudden, Bischoff looked bored. "Gift exchange is the day after Armageddon, December 15th."

"I know that," Trish replied. "But apparently my secret santa doesn't. Since Friday I've been given two secret santa gifts, with at least one of those being worth a lot more than twenty dollars."

Bischoff sat back in his chair. "And what do you want me to do about it, Trish?"

"I want to know who my secret santa is," Trish repeated. "It's causing problems for my relationship. My boyfriend wants to kick this guy's ass."

"Who is your boyfriend of the moment?" Bischoff pried.

"Bubba Ray, you know it's Bubba Ray."

"And why should I care that Bubba Ray Dudley's upset, hey, Trish?" Bischoff asked her calmly. "If someone wants to go against the secret santa rules, that's their business."

"I need to tell this person that I'm already in a long-term committed relationship," Trish explained.

"So tell them," Bischoff replied boredly, looking down at his papers.

"I would if I knew who it was," Trish sighed.

Bischoff looked up again, a smile slowly spreading across his face. "Tell you what, Trish. I might be able to help you out after all. See, I could tell you who your secret santa is, but in return I'd be needing something from you. Tit for tat, so to speak."

Trish's face crumpled into a frown. "Not a chance, Bischoff. No way. I'll figure it out myself."

"Hey!" Bischoff called as she began to leave. "You won't get a better offer than that. I know who it is and I won't tell you, Trish. You won't ever know until your relationship with that Dudley Boy is dead and buried. Dead and buried."

* * * *

"So, did you find out?" Lita prompted when Trish returned to the locker room.

"No," Trish replied. "Although I do have two theories. Either it's Bischoff. . ." She paused to allow the other divas to groan their disgust. ". . .Or it's someone with a tattoo."

"Well, that narrows it down," Gail commented.

"It was the best I could do," Trish told her. "Put it this way, I was not willing to do what Bischoff wanted me to do just to find out."

"I would have," Gail shrugged.

"Gail, you already have," Terri reminded her.

"Well, we have some news for you, Trish," Molly piped up. "It might be Maven. Your secret Santa struck again."

Trish frowned as Molly handed her another package, this one wrapped in Christmas paper.

Again Trish read the card out loud. Surely something about the writer's style had to trigger something in her fellow divas.

"'Trish, I know you like your bikini shoots on the beach, so I thought I'd bring the beach to you. Merry Christmas. Your Secret Santa.'"

But instead of guessing the gift-giver, all of the divas wanted to have their two cents worth on what the gift might be.

"A bottle of suncreen," a cynical Ivory suggested.

"A sexy bikini," Terri guessed.

"A seascape painting," Molly decided.

"It's the wrong shape for all of those," Lita pointed out. "Just open it, Trish."

And so she did, to discover a large, polished conch shell.

"Oh, that's the kind where if you put it to your ear you can hear the ocean!" Molly called.

"I guess that's what he was getting at," Trish shrugged. "Guys, take a look at the card. Do any of you recognize the handwriting?"

One by one, the other divas examined the card and one by one, they shook their heads.

"Well, that really does help," Trish announced.

"Yeah," Terri nodded. "It's not Booker or Kane."

"Or Stevie," Victoria added.

"Thank God," Trish muttered.

"It's not Spike or Hurricane. . .I mean Shane," Molly went on.

"Or Matt," Lita nodded. "And I think all of us would recognize Bischoff's writing, so it's not him either."

Trish looked at Gail, but all she could do was shrug. "Do you think I'd actually care about their writing? Sheesh."

Trish rolled her eyes and turned to Stacy. "And it's not Drew or Scott."

"Or Bubba or D-Von," Stacy added.

Trish was instantly scowling. "Don't you think I'd be able to work out whether it was Bubba myself?"

"God, Trish, I was just trying to help," Stacy bit back, completely affronted.

"Yeah," Trish muttered. "Sure you were."

"But anyway," Lita called over her. "That cuts around ten people off our suspect list."

"Ooh, sounds like a real mystery," Molly smiled.

Trish just nodded, deep in thought, before a lightbulb went off and she turned to Molly. "You said it might be Maven. Why'd you say that?"

"Because he brought the gift here," Molly replied.

"Really? Why didn't you just say so in the first place?" Trish cried.

"I tried, but you wanted to open the gift," Molly argued.

Trish gave an exasperated sigh. "Okay. Even if it's not Maven, it is a new lead. See you guys later."

* * * *

"Maven."

The first Tough Enough winner was stretching in the hallway, having escaped the bustle of the men's locker room.

When Trish called his name, he rolled into a sitting position and grinned up at her.

"Hey Trish. What's up?"

"Not much," Trish replied casually. "I just want to know about that package you brought for me."

"Oh, that wasn't from me," Maven announced.

"It. . .wasn't?" Trish asked unsteadily.

"No," Maven confirmed. "Me, Jindrak and Cade saw it when we went down the ring to practice. Hey, you look disappointed it wasn't from me. Everything's okay with you and Bubba, right?"

"Yeah," Trish nodded. "Everything's great. . .well, except for this person who keeps giving me presents, I mean the presents are great, but Bubba's not impressed."

"I bet not," Maven replied sympathetically. "So how many presents have you gotten from the anonymous gift giver?"

"Three so far," Trish told him. "I just wish I knew who it was, so I could thank him, but tell him that I'm already with Bubba."

"Well, I could try to find out for you," Maven suggested. 

"You'd do that?" Trish asked, finally smiling again.

"Sure," Maven nodded. "I'd do anything for a pretty face. Even one with a big bad Dudley Boy for a boyfriend. I'll let you know if I see or hear anything, okay?"

"Okay, thanks, Maven," Trish smiled. "Who've you got tonight?"

"It's me, Jindrak and Cade against La Resistance and Rico," Maven told her. "House shows. Who can understand them?"

"Yeah," Trish agreed. "A bit like my secret santa. Bye, Maven."

Shrugging her shoulders back, she again headed back to her own locker room. When she got there, she slumped down on a chair next to Lita and rested her head on her friend's shoulder.

"This is starting to get frustrating," she announced as Lita patted her head.

"No luck?" Lita asked.

"It's not Maven," Trish told her. "He, Jindrak and Cade found the package when they were working out in the ring." She glanced up and looked for her fellow Canadian. "Gail, did you know that last week's tag team is taking on this week's tag team tonight?"

"I know, pretty fun, eh?" Gail smiled.

Trish rolled her eyes. "We work in a place where a rumour can travel faster than the speed of light. Why doesn't anyone know who my secret santa is?"

"Maybe you're just asking the wrong people," Lita suggested.

"Obviously," Trish sighed. 

"Hey," Lita soothed her. "Don't worry about it. So you have an admirer. You should be flattered, not frustrated."

"I am," Trish replied. "I just. . .I don't want Bubba getting all jealous for no reason. Not when Christmas is coming up. You know, it's the first Christmas since we moved in together, not to mention the anniversary of our first year together and I don't want this hanging over our heads."

"You're such a drama queen," Gail stated. "If Bubba doesn't like it, he can leave. There's plenty more guys where he came from."

"What if it really is Maven?" Molly asked suddenly. "What if he lied because he's too shy to say he has a crush on you? He seems like a sweet guy, he mght be like that."

"Yeah, maybe," Trish replied.

"Whatever," Gail called impatiently. "I said I'd figure it out and I will. By tomorrow night, I promise you, Trish, I will tell you the name of your secret santa. Maybe then we can all shut up about it."

* * * *

"It's Christian," Gail announced triumphantly, the moment Trish entered the room before Raw the next night.

Trish's eyes widened. "It's who?"

"Christian," Gail repeated smugly. "Don't look so surprised that I came through. I said I would."

"Christian," a flustered Trish murmured. "How. . .how do you know?"

"Mark was sitting by him when the bucket went around," Gail explained. "He happened to see the name on the paper."

"Or maybe he just said that so you'd screw him," Lita suggested. "You did tell us that guys'll do anything to get in bed with you."

"Why would he make it up?" Gail challenged. "If he was going to make it up, wouldn't he say it was him so I'd get jealous and try a little harder? You know I'm right. So there you have it, Trish. Now you know who your secret santa is, can we all get on with our lives?"

"Wow, Christian," Trish breathed. "I've gotta talk to him. I've gotta tell him. . .wow. . .wish me luck, girls. Somehow I have to let him down easy."

"Good luck, heartbreaker," Lita grinned.

* * * *

"So then the chick from the drive thru says, 'hey, aren't you from the WWE?'"

Trish heard Christian's voice before she saw him. He was loud, brash, bragging to his friends about some girl he'd met. Could he really be her secret admirer? Determinedly, she put her head down and marched towards him.

"Christian, I. . .oh, Bubba!" she cried. The last thing she'd expected was for her boyfriend to be a member of Christian's story telling group. When it came to their former TLC opponents, he and Bubba sure took love-hate relationship to a whole new level.

Christian laughed. "So, that's how she does it, eh? 'Ooooh Bubba! Ooooh yes!'" he mimicked in a high voice.

Bubba also gave a low chuckle, pulling Trish in to stand between his legs. "What's up, babe?" he asked, wrapping his arms around her middle.

Trish sighed, leaning back into him. She felt incredibly foolish and there wasn't a thing she could do about it - not with Bubba right here. "Nothing."

Bubba moved his head so their cheeks were touching. "Don't look like nothing. Hey, forget these clowns. You know they're jealous."

Maybe Christian was a little more jealous than Bubba even realized.

"Who you calling a clown, assclown?" Jericho shot back, before grinning at Trish. "Ready for our bit tonight, Trishy?"

"Sure, as ready as anyone can be when they have to kiss you, Chris," she replied cattily.

"Ooh, I can't wait!" Jericho cheered. "And I'll make sure I put in a little extra tongue just for loverboy there."

"Dude, you wanna tongue Bubba Ray?" a disgusted Christian cried, deliberately misunderstanding.

"Back off, Jericho, he's mine," Trish growled, before turning around in Bubba's arms. "See you later?"

Bubba frowned at her. "You sure you're okay?"

"Yeah," Trish nodded. "I got what I came for."

"Uh, okay," Bubba replied, confused.

Trish just smiled at him and leaned in to kiss him on the lips, before grabbing him behind the head and turning it into a French kiss that was so intense it was practically pornographic.

She drew back, grinning at Bubba's openmouthed friends.

"Bye, boys," she called, giving a coy little wave before she started to walk away.

"Whoa," Jericho commented. "She never does that to me."

"Jericho what is it about the words 'stage kiss' you don't understand?" Bubba snapped, bringing a smile to Trish's lips. 

But the smile slowly faded as she realized she'd accomplished absolutely nothing. Who knew how long she'd have to wait to talk to Christian? And before then, she ran the risk of getting another gift, one that would really make Bubba lose it. Luckily he hadn't seen the conch, she would have definitely had trouble explaining that. 

She pulled out a cell phone, deciding to send Christian a text message, letting him know she was onto him. She typed quickly as she walked.

'I need talk 2 u. Dont tell Bubba'

Sighing, she erased the message. Too incriminating. If, by chance, Christian showed Bubba that message, things would be worse than ever. She'd just have to wait until the moment presented itself, or until the secret santa did something so characteristic there could be no doubting who he was.

"Trish!"

She stopped at the sound of her name and turned to see Jessie striding towards her, carrying yet another package.

"This Fed-Ex arrived for you," Jessie explained, handing it over.

"Oh, thanks," Trish replied, turning it over to read the sender's information. Only two words were written there. 'Secret Santa'.

"It was Fed-Ex, so I don't know who it came from," Jessie pre-empted her, with a look of soulful sadness on her face.

"Yeah," Trish sighed. "I'll figure it out. Hey, how's that boyfriend of yours going?"

"Terrible," Jessie replied bluntly. "I think he might break up with me. All we do is fight."

"Well, if that's the truth, maybe you're better off without him," Trish suggested.

"Yeah, maybe," Jessie shrugged. "You know, I love the stupid ass, though. See ya, Trish. I gotta get back to work."

"Bye Jessie."

Trish sized up the latest package, then tucked it under her arm and walked back to the locker room.

"Well, I still don't know if it's Christian," she told the other girls, before holding up the package. "But whoever it is is making sure I don't feel neglected."

She tossed the package towards the rest of her things without giving it another look to be sure it had landed safely.

"Aren't you going to open it?" Molly asked her.

"Nope," Trish shrugged, deliberately ignoring the package as she stepped over to her bag and began taking out her ring outfit. "If I pretend it's not there, it doesn't affect me."

As Trish prepared for the night ahead, the other divas glanced from her, to the package and back again. Finally, Gail Kim couldn't take it anymore, diving over to the package and tearing it open.

"Where's Waldo?" she cried, her disappointment obvious. "I don't get it."

"I'm sure there's a note," Trish replied nonchalantly. "Trish. Blah blah blah. Merry Christmas. Your Secret Santa."

"No note," Gail told her. "It was only done up in bubble wrap."

"Here," Trish called, finally taking possession of her gift. She held the book by its spine with the pages down, then shook it. Sure enough, a slip of paper fell to the floor. Trish reached for it, but Gail was there first.

"'Trish'," she read. "'Don't try to find me. I'll reveal myself at the right time. Until then, have fun finding Waldo. Merry Christmas! Your Secret Santa'."

"It does not say that," Lita argued.

"See for yourself," Gail told them.

Lita took the paper from her, notcing that Trish was again feigning disinterest. 

"Yeah, that's what it says," she confirmed. "Can I keep this, Trish?"

"Sure," Trish shrugged. "Why?"

"I'm gonna ask Christian straight out if he wrote it."

"No, don't!" Trish blurted.

Lita arched an eyebrow. "Why not?"

Trish took a deep breath, her outburst having surprised even her. "When I saw him, he was with Bubba. If Bubba sees that note and it is from Christian, well, bad stuff, Lita. Real bad. Just. . .just let me handle it."

"O-kay," Lita replied slowly.

"I have an idea," Molly announced, darting over to her own bag. She rifled through it for a moment before emerging triumphantly with a small hardbound book. "I don't have Christian's address. I'll get him to write it in here - I'll tell him it's for my Christmas card list, that I'm not gonna have time to do them until our break, then I'll come back here and we can check the writing to see if it matches."

Trish nodded slowly. "That's a really good idea. But you might want to get the other guys' addresses too, so it doesn't look suspicious."

"All right," Molly smiled. "Then we really will know."

* * * *

She approached the group and collected their addresses, looking and acting every inch the class nerd in search of yearbook signatures. When the book reached Bubba, she snatched it back.

"I have your address, Bubba," she announced. "You live with Trish." And as she said it she couldn't help giving Christian a pointed look. 

With that being the only conflict, she had what she came for and went to check back with Trish, who compared the writing styles.

"It's him," she nodded emotionlessly. "The note's written more carefully than the address, but it's definitely him. My secret santa is Christian."

But she had no more time to confront him all night. Raw was about to start and they had a show to do.

* * * *


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviews – you make it worth it!! The song in this one is by Berlin. Lyrics used without permission

"Trish, what the hell is this?"

Three days later she remembered Bubba's words, his exact tone of voice. On Tuesday, while she was paying bills, he'd decided to do some laundry and had uncovered the conch shell, wrapped up in one of her shirts. She'd had to confess everything, up to and including 'Where's Waldo' but not going as far as revealing that she knew who it was. And then something strange came over Bubba. Realizing that he was contending with an enemy he couldn't see or fight, he began to try harder, a little too hard. When they'd made love it had seemed almost forced and in the end she'd faked it - something she'd only had to do once or twice before and only when one of them had had a particularly hard day. Bubba hadn't seemed to notice, but that didn't stop her from feeling terrible about it. She had to sort this out, had to sit down with Christian for a deep and meaningful, so the presents would stop and things could go back to normal. 

But in the meantime, she had a few options.

She thought about sticking by Bubba's side until she was absolutely sure that Christian was elsewhere, but that would just look suspicious. She and Bubba had always given each other their space to have their own friends and carve their own niche in the WWE. It was one of the great things about their relationship and Trish didn't want to mess with it - not for the sake of a crush. 

Or she could just go on doing nothing. Maybe if she pretended like nothing was going on, it would all just settle. Neither Bubba nor Christian had any idea that she knew the identity of the secret santa, so if Trish could only keep it that way, letting Bubba go on being pissed off and Christian being anonymous, everything would be cool. Surely she could deal with bad sex until Secret Santa day. . .couldn't she?

And then there was one final option - she could flaunt it. Not that she knew her admirer's identity, but that she had a secret santa who wanted to give her an extra large dose of Christmas cheer. She could wear her earrings and watch, and let the word spread around as her coworkers talked behind her back about what Bubba was possibly going to do about the situation. Maybe then Christian would realize what everyone else seemed to know - that Trish was untouchable - and back off. Yeah, that was definitely the way to go. 

She headed into the main hotel room from the bathroom, where she'd been fixing her hair and putting on makeup. In seemingly moments, the earrings were in and her watch was on. She crawled up behind Bubba, who was sitting on the bed and writing Christmas cards.

"Are you ready to go?" she asked, wrapping her arms around his shoulders from behind.

"Mmm," he nodded as she began kissing the back of his neck. "I got maybe two to go. Could you throw a towel in with my stuff?"

"Sure," Trish replied, but she didn't move as she went on kissing him.

"Trish?" he asked a few moments later.

"Mmm hmm?"

"What are you. . ."

He didn't get to finish his question. Trish had thrown him down and was kissing him hard on the mouth.

"I love you, Bubba Ray," she told him. "You're the only man whose lap I wanna be sitting in this Christmas."

Bubba grinned and leaned up to share in the kiss. "Will you tell me all your Christmas wishes and fantasies?"

"You bet," Trish nodded.

"Well then," Bubba smiled. "Bubba Claus will just have to make sure they all come true."

* * * *

"You look happy," Lita greeted her.

"I am," Trish nodded.

"You're wearing your Secret Santa stuff," Lita noticed.

"Yep."

"Well?" The redhead was staring at her expectantly.

"I'm not going to let it bother me anymore," Trish replied simply. "So someone has a crush on me and wants to buy me stuff. I say let them. I mean, I have been the internet babe of the year three years running."

"Proving once and for all that geeks love you," Lita teased.

"Yep, and teenagers love you," Trish nodded. "But anyway, I'm letting it go now, Li. It's not as though the fans don't try to give me gifts - why shouldn't my coworkers?"

"Ah, she's finally getting it," Gail Kim called out, approaching Trish. "Oh, but while you're investigating this, keep away from Jindrak and Cade. I'm not quite done with them yet."

"That's okay, Gail," Trish waved her off. "They're all yours."

"You should hit on them anyway, just to see the look on her face," Lita murmured.

"This isn't about me hitting on anyone," Trish told her. "This is about me - and Bubba - just letting things be. That's all."

"What about Christian?" Lita prompted.

"What about him?"

"Where's Waldo? Don't try to find me? That's pretty creepy. What if he starts getting all psycho obsessive?"

"Where's Waldo was just Christian being goofy," Trish argued. "You know he's one of the goofiest guys on the roster."

"Yeah, but there's goofy and then there's just plain weird," Lita pointed out.

"Okay," Trish agreed. "If at any time he gives me a horse's head with a note saying he wants to mount me, I'll call the police. But I really think it's harmless and either he'll back off, or he'll make a move, at which point I'll let him down easy."

"If you think that's the right thing to do," Lita conceded. "But anyway, tonight's gift's already here. Happy secret santa."

She handed over another package, once again wrapped in Christmas paper. It was around the size and shape to again be a book - a small novel, perhaps. Trish just opened it casually.

"If he wants to spend all this money on me, that's up to him."

"What is it?" Lita asked her.

"A DVD. Scooby Doo."

"No note this time?" Lita prompted.

"Not that I can see. Wait, the DVD's not in plastic." She opened the cover and sure enough, there was her note.

'Trish. Sorry if I got a little spooky with the book last Monday. I promise I will reveal myself when the time is right. Until then, you can be Daphne and I'll be Fred. Merry Christmas. Your Secret Santa.'

"Aww, that's sweet," Terri called across the room.

"Yeah, it is," Lita agreed. "Too sweet. Trish, girl, he's got a gigantic crush on you. And speaking of crushing, he's gonna be destroyed if you wait until secret santa day to turn him down. I think you should just get it over with."

"I can't," Trish insisted. "He's knows I'm with Bubba. It's not as though that's some secret. Any way of meeting him in private is sure to be found out by Bubba and put our relationship at risk. So just like me, Christian will have to wait. Cool DVD though."

* * * *

"So, are we clear on that, Trish?" Jericho asked her.

"Sure, sounds fine to me."

"Great, then we're done here. See you out there." He gave her a winning grin and began to leave.

They were doing a bit for the house show, quite apart from any matches, where Chris Jericho was trying to get Trish back after having lied to her. It ended with Trish conceding to his request for a hug, only to sink her knee up into his balls. Should be pretty fun but it proved Jericho was a weird one, considering the whole knee to the groin thing had been his idea.

"Hey Chris," she called, stopping him from leaving. While she'd decided not to approach Christian, surely no one would know how deep his feelings for her ran than his friends - well, the ones who weren't Bubba, anyway.

Jericho turned back expectantly.

"Christian's your best friend, right?"

Jericho grinned. "Trish, men don't have best friends. They have drinking buddies."

"Right, well I know Christian's one of your favourite drinking buddies. Has he ever. . .you know, said anything about me?"

Jericho frowned at her. "Christian?"

"Yeah," Trish nodded. "I mean, has he mentioned possibly having feelings for me?"

"Trish," Jericho replied slowly. "I had no idea you and Bubba boy were ending it. . ."

"We're not," Trish cut in assuredly. "Me and Bubba are great right now. . ."

"Right, I got ya," Jericho replied. "You're keeping your options open."

"No," Trish insisted. "Okay, you've probably heard that someone's giving me more than my fair share of secret santa gifts. Well, I think that someone is Christian."

"No, it's not," Jericho told her instantly.

"It - it's not?" Trish asked.

"Nope. Christian drew Lawler. He's buying him porn. Easiest man in the world to buy for. What's hard is finding a porno Lawler hasn't seen."

"Right," Trish sighed. "But anyway, about Christian. Mark Jindrak was sitting next to him and said he drew my name."

"Jindrak's full of shit. I was next to Christian. Trust me, Trish. He drew Lawler. He's not your mysterious santa."

Trish stared at Jericho for a few moments. He looked so certain - and who was she to believe Gail Kim over him, who she'd known for far longer?

"So he definitely drew Lawler?"

"Yeah," Jericho nodded. "But don't go spreading that around. It's supposed to be a secret. You know, secret santa?"

"Okay. Thanks, Chris."

"Anytime."

Trish shook her head in confusion as she headed back to the locker room, the scene she'd just practiced already far from her mind. So she was back to square one.

"Girls, we were wrong. It's not Christian."

"What?" Lita asked.

"I just talked to Jericho and he said Jindrak was lying, probably because someone was withholding sex until she got a response." She narrowed her eyes at Gail. "Apparently Christian drew Jerry Lawler."

"Okay," Gail replied, her voice already snarky. "Firstly, withhold sex? I'd never do such a thing. And secondly, we already proved it was Christian. Remember the handwriting?"

"Oh yeah," Trish murmured sheepishly.

"Well, it does tell us something new," Lita announced. "Not only does Christian like you, but Jericho's in on it and is trying to help him. Poor Bubba can't even trust his friends."

"Hey, maybe you can talk to him," Trish suggested.

"Who, Bubba?" Lita questioned.

"No, Christian. Do you guys have a sketch tonight?"

"Yeah, but we already practiced."

"Oh." Trish's face fell. "Okay then. I just thought that since it's gonna be tough for me to do it without Bubba finding out. . ."

"I'll talk to him, Trish," Lita cut in. "Later. After the show. It is about to start, though with all the running around you keep doing I'm not surprised you didn't know that. But I'll ask him for a drink after. We can have a nice long chat."

"Thanks, Li. Tell me everything?"

"You bet."

* * * *

Trish and Bubba were just drifting off to sleep when one of their cell phones beeped loudly.

A semi-asleep Bubba let out a groan. "Yours or mine?"

"I don't. . ." Trish began before her mind cleared enough for her to think. "It's probably Lita. She was going out with Christian tonight."

"Mmm," Bubba replied, barely registering. He rolled over as Trish turned on the bedside light and reached for her phone. Sure enough, there was a message from Lita.

'He said same as Y2J. C U 2morrow 4 lunch.'

Now it was Trish's turn to groan. Either there was some great conspiracy going on between Christian and Jericho, or there was someone out there sending her stuff who just happened to have very similar handwriting to the CLB. Whatever, it could wait until she and Lita discussed it properly over lunch tomorrow. Right now Trish had only one thing on her mind. Sleep.

* * * *

"See, what I don't understand is why he's going to all this effort to pretend it's not him," Trish stated as they drove back to the hotel, continuing the same conversation they'd started over lunch. "He's always seemed the 'take credit' kind to me, even when it's not his work. You'd think he'd be telling everyone about all the work he's doing to get me."

"Unless it really isn't him," Lita suggested.

Trish cocked her head at Lita. "You've said that a few times today. Do you really believe it's someone else? Even though we had all these clues that it might be him."

"What do we have?" Lita countered. "Some generic handwriting and the word of a rookie we don't even know. I was so sure last night, Trish. He had me totally convinced."

"And today? What do you think today? Is it him?"

"I really don't know anymore," Lita sighed. "I mean, he's the easy answer - as in, if it's not him, who is it? But put it this way. If it is him, he's a really, really good liar."

Trish sat back in her seat. If even her best friend was doubting it was Christian, where did that leave her? Back to suspecting Maven, or someone else altogether? She wasn't sure she liked that idea. Christian was goofy, non-threatening. What if it actually ended up being someone like Mark Henry, Scott Steiner or Kane? In nine days, she'd know for sure - unless she kept on pushing and searching. She liked the thought of it being Christian, that on December 15th he'd admit that he and Jericho had cooked up this little thing to keep the secret. It would be hard telling him she wasn't interested, but at least the idea of him crushing on her wasn't completely repulsive.

"Well, do you think I should keep looking or just wait?" she asked Lita.

Lita shrugged. "It's up to you. Personally, I thought you were on to something yesterday when you said you'd just let whoever it was keep on admiring you and buying you things. I was just making sure you'd thought it through, that it was what you wanted to do."

"I don't even know what I want to do," Trish told her. "I mean, it sucks for Bubba, but to tell you the truth, I love waiting to see what he's going to get me next. I'm getting a little kick out of opening the gifts."

"Or a big kick," Lita teased. "Enjoy it. Maybe whoever it is just wants you to be happy, to feel loved. Everyone deserves to be loved. . ." Her voice darkened and she frowned at the road ahead.

"You still miss him?" Trish asked gently.

Lita nodded slowly. "Stupid, huh? We broke up so long ago. It's just sometimes. . .I really thought he was the one, you know? I thought we'd wind up getting married, having kids. . ."

"We all thought that about you guys," Trish told her.

"Yeah, well I guess Matt didn't," Lita muttered. "But whatever, I just have to get over it." She leaned forward to turn on the radio, then pressed a button to searching for local stations. "Music time."

Seconds later sound emanated from the speakers as the radio tuned into a station. The strains of Berlin's 'Take My Breath Away' filled the car.

"Too depressing," Trish muttered, reaching down to change stations.

But Lita stopped it. "Leave it. I love that song."

Trish gave her a quirky look. "You don't normally like this kind of music."

"Well, I like this song. It's romantic. Reminds me of Matt."

"And you want that?"

Lita hesitated. "Yeah. . .I know it's crazy, but I'm not ready to let go just yet."

"That's not crazy," Trish replied quietly. "And we can listen if you want to. But if the next song sucks, I'm changing it."

Lita didn't reply. She was too busy with driving and listening to the song. Trish, too, let the words and music wash over her. Lita was right; it was a beautiful song. The words, the music. . .

'Through the hourglass I saw you

In time you slipped away,

When the mirror crashed I called you

And turned to hear you say

If only for today

I am unafraid'

'Take My Breath Away'

'Watching every motion

In this foolish lover's game

Haunted by the notion

Somewhere there's a love in flames

Turning and returning

To some secret place inside

Watching in slow motion

As you turn around and say'

The song finished and the DJ spoke.

"That's Berlin with 'Take My Breath Away' on your all-request Saturday and that's the third of our three song block going out to Trish from her secret santa. . .or should we say her secret admirer."

"Oh my God, Trish, did you hear that?" Lita cried.

"What, you think it's me?" Trish frowned. "No way. How would he know I'd be listening at this exact time?"

"I don't know," Lita shrugged. "But he requested three songs. Maybe he thought he'd just try and hope you'd hear it."

"Yeah," Trish agreed. "Seems like a long shot, though."

"Coincidence, maybe?" Lita suggested. "A lot of good things in life are about coincidence."

"Are you saying this whole thing is good?" Trish frowned.

"Well, it's definitely not bad," Lita replied. "In one corner you have Bubba, the devoted boyfriend and in the other, a masked newcomer, determined to win the match of his life. It's pay per view stuff, Trishy."

"Well, I'm sorry, Lita, but this love match is ending in a no contest," Trish announced. "I'm all Bubba's. . .no matter how many songs this guy requests for me."

* * * *

Trish heard the music slowly wafting through the air.

'Turning and returning

To some secret place inside

Watching in slow motion

As you turn around and say'

'Take my breath away'

Christian - could he possibly have come up with such a gorgeous song to request for her? She would have picked him more for a Jay-Z or 50 Cent fan when it came to how to seduce a woman. 

She pushed open the door to the locker room, but the music only got louder.

'Watching I keep waiting

Still anticipating love

Never hesitating

To became the fated ones'

"Very funny, Lita," she commented, spotting the small stereo. She froze when she realized that only Gail, Victoria and Molly were in the room.

"Why is that song playing?" she demanded, a chill rushing over her entire body.

"Because Molly likes it," Gail replied. "It's your latest present, by the way. We thought we'd open it for you."

"What's my latest present?" Trish frowned.

"This CD." Gail held up the case. "'The World's Best Love Songs, Volume One.' It has some real sappy tunes, 'I Want To Know What Love Is', 'Love Is All Around', this one."

"If that's my present, where's the note?" Trish asked and Gail instantly held up a piece of paper in her other hand. "He was cool, but then he turned sappy. It's time to let him go."

Trish took the note from her and began to read. 

'Trish. Hope you caught my radio presentation today, but even if you didn't, those three songs are all on this CD, along with some others that also express how I feel about you. You're amazing. Merry Christmas. Your Secret Santa.'

"Wow," Trish mused. "He really put a lot of effort into this one."

"And with it, he bought himself a one way ticket to Loserville," Gail muttered.

"Gail, I just realized something," Trish announced. "You're jealous of this secret santa thing. While I have someone spending countless hours on me, you have to hit on rookie tag teams just to get any action at all."

Gail let out a laugh. "You really need all the attention on you, don't you? As if I'd want a CD with 'Wind Beneath My Wings' on it."

"Unless it actually came from someone you want to be your next conquest, and you know it, but you don't want to tell me."

"Okay, take a pill," Gail snapped. "How many times do we have to remind you that your stupid admirer is Christian?"

"Is it, Gail? Or is that little story just an attempt to buy some time while you work on this guy yourself? Jericho has said straight out that it's not Christian, who confirmed it."

"Then they're your liars," Gail replied strongly. "I don't know what this is, if it's some little game Jericho and Christian have going on, but I personally have nothing to gain by lying to you. I did what I said I'd do and found out for you. If you want to question my source, that's up to you. . ."

"I am questioning your source, Gail," Trish cut in. "I still think what I said before - that Jindrak only said it was Christian to get some from you - that's if Jindrak said it at all."

"Why would he make that up?" Gail challenged. "Why Christian? Why not Kane or Hunter or Goldberg?"

"Goldberg's excused from the secret santa draw because of his religion," Molly piped up, but the other two ignored her.

"That's why I'm wondering if he said it at all," Trish snapped. "I think you made it up. Why Christian? I don't know. Maybe you saw that he and Bubba have started hanging out again and you wanted to stop that because you're a nasty little slut who doesn't want anyone, including yourself, to be happy. Maybe that's it."

Gail glared back savagely. "When this whole thing's over and you see I was right all along, I expect a full apology - dark chocolates, not milk. Until then, you can do whatever you think you need to do. I'm not defending myself to you. I have nothing to prove. You just play your little conspiracy theory game. I'm out of it."

Trish held out her hands in frustration. "Gail? We could do the normal thing and settle our differences in the ring."

"There's nothing to settle," Gail replied darkly. "I'm waiting this one out. Good luck on your wild goose chase, though. I'm glad some people have that much time on their hands."

Then all was quiet until a new song started. Molly frowned over at Trish.

"I was the one that got Christian's handwriting. We all saw it matched."

"I'm just not sure anymore, Molly," Trish sighed. "Maybe it didn't match at all. Maybe I just wanted it to. Here, compare this note if you want to."

Molly took the piece of paper and headed over to get out her address book.

"It could match," she announced minutes later. "But it looks like a few of these - maybe Shawn Michaels or Tommy Dreamer."

"I guess it doesn't really matter who it is," Trish conceded. "I'd be turning him down anyway. It's just that if you know what you're dealing with, you can kind of predict the consequences."

"Well, who don't you want it to be?" Victoria asked. "I mean, you're talking about consequences, like your whole world will come crashing down around you as soon as this guy takes off his 'mask'. Whose face is there, Trish? Who would really make things difficult, if it was them?"

"Well, D-Von or Spike, obviously," Trish replied. "Or Matt Hardy. . .or Drew, for that matter. Randy Orton or those other Evolution guys probably wouldn't take no for an answer and Bischoff would try to get political, like he could even try to fire me or Bubba like he did to Lita. So yeah, any of those."

"Okay," Victoria nodded. "And who do you want it to be?"

"What do you mean who do I want it to be?" Trish cried defensively. "No one!"

"But someone on this roster is sending you romantic gifts and trying to steal you away. Who is that someone?"

Trish hesitated as she realized the truth. Who did she want it to be? She couldn't tell the other divas, but she did know the answer to that one. Christian.

* * * *


End file.
